Four Lives. Two Worlds. One Dream. The Learning.

Reflection:

Rhea’s story about her husband being sent to jail because of his addiction to drugs reminded me a lot of the stories that I would hear about my father when I was growing up.

I never really heard good things about my dad. The only things that my relatives would mention about him is his drug addiction and how he would be missing for days at a time. It was always a mystery where he would be for those days that he was gone. Who was he with? Where did he sleep? He would only come back to my grandparents house to refuel, clean-up and possibly steal things from my grandparents that he could sell to have money to buy more drugs. He never had a real job and he relies on his grandparents second-hand business and his siblings hard-earned money in the States.

It was always so confusing for me as a kid to process all of these things about my dad. Everyone around me made sure that I knew how horrible these things were but no one ever talked about the root of these problems. I grew up trying to figure out who was to blame for dad’s inability to be a father. Was he just a bad person? Was it his parents fault for enabling him? Was it the pressure of being the youngest of four sons? Was it because he didn’t want kids?

It was difficult to watch Rhea blame herself for her husband’s situation because it is unfair for her to carry that burden on top of already having to provide for her whole family. I have felt similarly to Rhea of feeling guilty for my father’s addiction.

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